I had my first migraine when I was fourteen. I have such odd recollections of that experience. I was at school, a freshman in high school. I would not consider my high school warm or nurturing. Oddly enough, the gym was where you could find some of the warmest people in that place. It was true for me that day at least.

The sun was bright. The room was bright. The wall was cold when I leaned against it. It was a measure of how awful I felt when I let our P.E. teacher (a wonderful, warm woman who died of cancer within a couple of years of my knowing her) drive me home. It was only five or six blocks, and I don't like asking for help. She always called me Julie after that, and I never had the heart (or confidence) to correct her. I still have trouble with that.

Since that day 26 years ago, I've had headaches. Not always migraines, but headaches. There have been periods of my life that have been rather blissfully pain free. And there have been periods that have not. These things come in cycles, I suppose.

This summer it feels as if I've had a headache or a migraine every day.

Every.

Day.

Everyday.

Not blissfully pain free.

It's been a migraine summer. I'm tired of it. What can I say? My family is tired of it too. Who can blame them? On our drive back from New York, I had one of the worst migraines I've had in years. Trapped in the car, all I could do was rest my head on Callum's blanket and blast the a.c. vents on my body full force. Poor Neel spent the drive dealing with weather and hoping to come across an Urgent Care or ER somewhere along the way. I was hoping we would too. Note to self: the Eastern Shore of VA is NOT the place to look for a ER in the dark. During a storm. Not so much.

I have medication that I take when I'm having a headache, and it mostly works. I've been on a medication that works pretty darn well at preventing them. I'm not currently taking it because I don't love the side effects. Wondering though, if it might be time to reconsider.

Maybe.